-The Dundies-


Michael Scott: The Busiest Beaver Award goes to Phyllis Lappen! Yeah! Way to go, Phyllis! Nice work! Her usual!

Phyllis: It says 'Bushiest Beaver'.

Michael Scott: I told them busiest... idiots!

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Dwight Schrute: Having a bathroom is a privilege. It is called a 'ladies room' for a reason. And if you can not behave like ladies, well then you are not going to have a bathroom.

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-Conflict Resolution-

Jim Halpert: This came out really well. There you go. [hands Dwight his new ID]

Dwight Schrute: This is humongous, I am not a security threat. And my middle name is Kurt, not Fart.

Jim Halpert: What did I write?

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Michael Scott: Someone complained that the men's room is whites only. Stanley, you know that's not true.

Stanley: I didn't say that.

Creed: Then why is there a picture of a white man on the door?

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-Sexual Harrasment-

Michael Scott: Stanley, how about that hot picture you have by your desk? Centerfold in the Catholic schoolgirls' outfit? I mean it is hot, it is sexy and it turns him on and I will admit- best part of my morning is staring at it. But what are we just going to take it away?

Stanley: That is my daughter, she goes to Catholic girls school. I'm taking it down right now.

.....

Michael Scott: A guy goes to a $5 lady of the night, and he gets crabs. So the next day he goes back to complain and the woman says, 'Hey, it was only $5, what did you expect... lobster?'

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